I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i think i have herpe
just one?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
