didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
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