We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize