I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
