I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
