I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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