i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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