There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
be right there i have to get my cape
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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