You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
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And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
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He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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