I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize