Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
