I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
