Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize