glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
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