took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
