I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
