Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize