It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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