well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
