How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
