My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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