I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
