So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
