i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
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