I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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