I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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