her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Randomize