My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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