i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
