we're blogging at a bar
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
