The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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