Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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