do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
