I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
your like the ambassador to my penis.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
