Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Do vagina's smell?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
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