just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Randomize