WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
