I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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