Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
