Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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