just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
