Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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