Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
