i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
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