that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
