My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize