You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize
