Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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