You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
