I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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