Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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